Not So Good

That's my answer today.

Well anyhow. Update: I think I'm gonna delete my RA blog. Too hard to keep up with 2 blogs and it wasn't really helpful for charting b/c I can do it easier on paper and see more of it at the same time. One blog is more my speed.

Tomorrow I go in for self destruction to my rheumatologist to talk about what else I can do. It's to the point of being too hard to deal with. When I can't tear apart squares of toilet paper, then I obviously have a hard time serving my family. As the day wears on it's better. But so hard to deal with.

I feel like a whimp. Like I should give it more time. Wondering if it's the busyness of VBS. Or ...or...or???? I have no idea. And I especially hate the fact that I just don't know what's best to do. Or not do. And for the record...neither does anyone else.

My attitude is terrible. I'm sorry! Just being real folks.

VBS has been a great distraction this week. And has made me push myself harder than I otherwise would. It is also a tremendous praise. I remember when I was first diagnosed 6 months ago crying over the fact that I might not be able to do VBS. But look! I've done 2!!

AND....maybe, just maybe I'll wake up tomorrow and feel tons better anyway and cancel my appt. (just kidding Honey...kinda).