Jesus Loves The Little Children

Our little Warrior went home to his mom yesterday.  I hate it.  But I've done this long enough to know that it is never good and DHS does not ever do its job correctly.  So I'm sure glad I serve a mighty God who loves babies and hears the prayers of their sad mommas.  I'm praying hard for him and I'd appreciate it if you'd join me.  He is a great kid and needs a life of love and safety and lots of Jesus.

In the meantime I'll share a picture of another little boy that I prayed hard for.  DHS did not do their job in his case either but God showed up strong!

My Bennett.  Sleeping sweetly and looking adorable.  Safe. And so very loved. 
I'm thankful for my babies and my God who loves them more than I do!

Journal Prompt: What Would You Like To Change In Your Routine?

My morning routine has been my hardest routine for forever.  It's also my favorite part of the day.  If I had all the time in the world I would completely savor this time and spend a loooong time reading, journaling, and planning my day.

But since nobody has all the time in the world, I have to do most of that the night before.
I get up around 5:00-5:30 with my husband.  He heads straight to the garage to work out...seriously y'all.  Like even when it's cold and raining.  And I didn't even mention that the garage is detached and he has to walk outside to get there!

I get up and get his breakfast and lunch packed and go back to read, plan, think, and pray.  This is where I'm needing to switch it up.  Because by the time he leaves, I don't have much time before Warrior is up, someone needs help with school, and someone else wants to tell me that the 3yo got out of bed without permission and there's a squabble over the last 4 eggs in the fridge.

Then there's no going back.  The floodgates are open.  The day is in full-swing.

What I'd LIKE to happen is for me to get a work out in before I see the open eyes of a child.
I'd LIKE to have that workout finished and be dressed as well.  And if I could even make the bed before that happened.....oh my!!!

I've tried working it backward and switching things around.  I've tried exercising first and reading after.  I just can't fall into a routine with it and getting up before 5am isn't going to happen right now.
I'm fairly good at exercising later so it's not that big of a deal to me right now.

February Journaling

Still trying to jump back into blogging but not feeling very creative.  I spent some time last year with journal prompts and discovered I love them.  Pinterest is a great place for all things journal and here's one from today's prompt.....

Describe Your First Meal Of The Day

This morning was not like most.  It was my first time to ever substitute teach at the public elementary school.  I wanted something I could grab and eat while I was getting ready. 

Always, I start the day by refilling my water bottle.  While I was in there I popped a dozen eggs in the instant pot.  I grabbed a muffin, a clementine, and took my water back to my room to wait for the eggs. 

These muffins are my favorite go-to recipe.  They are made with leftover oatmeal and freshly ground white wheat and raisins. 

While I was getting dressed, my husband came in and surprised me with 2 eggs (with cheese) and toast!   I devoured the eggs (and the muffin) (and the clementine) and saved the toast for Warrior. 
The instant pot eggs got saved for later. 

I subbed in a class full of busy, smart first graders and was glad for the bigger-than-normal breakfast!

Warrior Update

God has given us the easiest, most flexible baby He ever created.  I'm serious.  

This is day 5 and he's warming up to the point of smiling at us most of the time.  He loves to roam the house and look for new things to touch.  But he's also content to stay in the room where we are.  He doesn't respond to many verbal commands yet, but is easy to re-direct.  

He sleeps in his crib and will fall asleep by himself as long as I am in the room with him.  He doesn't want to be alone.  He sleeps about 10 hours a night plus a good afternoon nap.  

Today was our first day of normal school with him joining us.  I set up the pack&play in the living room to use as a play pen for the morning meeting.  He just sat in it and played!!  No fit.  No crying.  

He eats everything but would prefer to feed himself.  He is starting to sign "all done".  

He's absolutely amazing and happy and sweet!! 

Valentine Warrior

Thursday was Valentines Day and my kids and I all planned to meet our homeschool group for a roller skating party.  FUN!! 

I always think skating is more fun than it actually is.  My older kids LOVE it.  But my littles only think they do.  I'm hoping they'll grow into it. 

On this skating trip, I got a phone call from a friend I don't get to talk to much.  It was Waylon's older sister's mom.  She was calling to let me know that their baby brother was brought into care and wondering if we could take him. 

I really didn't even have to think about it.  And I didn't have to ask my husband.  We tend to be in agreement about such things so I said yes. 

I said yes to an unknown future.  Yes to opening our entire family up to investigation again.  Yes to almost certain heartbreak.  Yes to loving a stranger. 

I called my husband and let him know and told the older kids we would load up the littles and have an emergency meeting outside the van.  I gave them the scoop and watched for reactions. 

HUGE smiles! "Let's DO it Mom!" and "We are back in the game!!" 
I was a tiny bit surprised.  It's been over a year since the adoptions were finalized and we haven't fostered since.  Everyone was exhausted and the whole family needed a break.  We even thought we would be done forever...maybe.  And I thought they would at least ask questions or want to know more details that I didn't have. 

My kids are awesome Y'all. 

So as not to leave anybody out, I had Jesse drive home so I could text all the adult kids and fill them in too.  Then more phone calls and texts to DHS updating them on our current family dynamic and sleeping arrangements.

That evening, a new resource worker came by with a mountain of paperwork to sign.   And it was perfect timing because all our older kids that had to sign just happened to be home that night too. 

Around 8pm two investigators showed up with an ADORABLE little man.  OH those brown eyes of his!!! 

He ate dinner, had a bath, and snuggled down to sleep in the pack-&-play.  SWOON!!

His name means Warrior.  (And he kinda looks like one!) For social media purposes that'll be his nickname.   I put out a quick update on Facebook asking for a crib.  We got a brand new one the same day from another foster mom.  Our friends brought diapers, wipes, clothes, and a noisy toy that all 3 little boys love.  My support group is incredible!

We spent the next day getting to know each other.  He is one busy guy! He climbs on everything, investigates everything, and hates going to bed.  He's very snuggly and would prefer sleeping with someone instead of in his new crib.  He's super easy to get along with and rarely ever cries.  I don't think we've seen all that he has to offer yet, but so far he is one easy baby!

We have no way of knowing how long he will get to stay but we are enjoying every minute and thankful for the time we get.  Laney said yesterday,  "I love him already!" 

I agree.

The Day I Fell In Love With God All Over Again

10 years ago we welcomed the sweetest, goofiest, and funniest puppy into our family.  He was 8 weeks old, deaf, and as big as some full grown dogs.  He was Laney's great dane Christmas puppy.

She was absolutely the BEST mom to him.  She kept him tethered to her belt with a leash when she was schooling and he was napping.  He slept in her room so she could get up with him in the night and she taught him hand signs to obey and to keep him safe.

He was born in Wyoming where we first met him and brought him home to Colorado.  He jumped and played in the snow with us.  We moved to Arkansas and he flopped his big body in the grass to soak up the sun then got up to drink and slobbered water all over the place.  He grew to be huge.  And gentle.  He laid his head in our laps when we sat and leaned against us when we stood.  He tried to walk between our legs to make sure he got petted all over.  Such a good good boy.

As Buzzy grew, Laney grew.  She got her first job and went to college.  She bought his dog food and fed him every morning.  He was happy every day when she got home.  He slept on a crib mattress in the house and was quite a pampered boy.

This past year we noticed Buzz starting to slow down.  Oh he still ran around the yard with our other dog.  He still wanted to join us on walks.  And sometimes he still galloped around just like a puppy.  But he was a bit slower and got tired easier.  It was harder for him to get up and down.  Laney bought him special vitamins. And I started to pray.

I prayed for God to protect him.  To give him good health.  That he would not know suffering.  And when the time came for him to pass, that it would be peaceful.   I prayed this very seriously to God for about a year.

This week it snowed.  It hasn't snowed here in about 2 years so it was a big deal.  In typical Buzzy fashion, he ran and played a bit and then wanted back in to warm up.   But the next day we could tell he didn't feel good.  And we found a mass on his shoulder that literally grew overnight.  Laney took him to the vet but he just kept getting worse.  Then we had blood work done and it showed that Buzzy's system was completely shutting down.  There was nothing to do and Laney had to make the decision that she never wanted to make.

Yesterday was an awful day.  Buzz kept declining and (of all things) Laney was scheduled to work.  I decided that he would not be left alone.  He loved his people.  So Mallory or I sat with him all day.  Right in front or beside him so he would know we were there.  Kids kept coming in and out petting him and loving on him.

He was happy when his girl got home and she spent every minute with him.
In the evening our vet friend graciously made a house call.  The kids all said good-bye to our sweet boy and Laney held him and loved him until the very last breath and heartbeat.

Later that night I was holding my sobbing girl and crying with her in the bathroom.  And she said the words that made me fall in love with my God all over again.  She said, "Mom, I just feel loved.  I didn't think I would feel this way. But I feel so loved with the way God handled his life. And when he died I could feel him sigh with relief. I'm glad I got to be his last comfort.  I don't regret any of it.  It was all worth it. "

I will never get over this.

I will never get over the fact that God gave 10 years of perfect health and protection to our dog that was of a problematic breed.  I will never get over God giving him snow on the last day that he would feel well enough to play.  I will never get over the fact that God heard and answered every one of my prayers about no suffering and that He even went above and beyond to allow Buzzy to pass away in the arms of his girl in his own home.  And I will never get over how much God made Laney feel loved.

Never.